Pain is a Bittersweet Friend of Mine
by thelonelywerewolfpepper
Summary: I am horrible at summaries, this just a One-shot that doesn't show a Major Character Death but mentions one. TW: Suicide Please Review


**AN: Hey guys um i just had this idea while sitting in my room being super angsty and depressed and hearing everyone say "Oh That's A Difficult Age" an' I'm Like "BITCH PLEASE" any way cranked this out in less than two hour and I don't have a Beta so and I didn't thoroughly edit this. I am trying to rewrite one story and write two others but. Oh and please don't rip off my shitty poetry. I literally got the idea for this while talking to myself aloud so. Any ways here you go...**

 _Pain is a bittersweet of mine_

 _When all I can feel is the burning and stinging_

 _I begin to play a dangerous game_

 _More of a dance than anything else_

 _It takes one for the suicidal salsa_

 _And 2 or more for the murderous mambo_

 _While I'm normally not one for the former_

 _sometimes when I feel mad as a hatter_

 _I indulge myself with my deadly addiction_

 _Often I engage in the murderous mambo_

 _With just the flick of my wrist_

 _I can introduce my bittersweet friend to others_

 _Pain and I have been playing this game far too long_

 _And for once in my life I lost_

 _Pain was a bittersweet friend of mine_

* * *

That was the letter I found on her nightstand after Henry found her dead. She killed herself on Thursday and Henry found her the next day. That was 3 days ago.

"Emma, he's better off without her. For Christ's sake Em, She killed innocent people." David tries to no avail to make me understand that I shouldn't care that Regina killed herself.

"My son just lost his mother, the woman who raised him. Don't bother saying other wise David. She feed him, kept him clothed, loved him, nursed every cough and cold, and kept a roof over his head," my voice breaks as I continue "When I couldn't. So you can try and act like Regina was the monster you need her to be Prince Charming but she wasn't or she wouldn't have adopted my son. So go ahead crucify her for your own selfish cause and one day Charming you'll how good she really was." I turn to leave the station and begin to walk away.

"You sound like you loved her." I stop dead in my track as my cheeks redden. Hanging my head I answer.

"I did." With that I walk to the bug, get in and drive to her the apartment to get ready to go to her funeral.

* * *

It's unusually hot out for late fall as the majority of Storybrooke stand around Regina's coffin. Taking a shuddering breath I walk to the podium to say a few words about our dearly ( _Okay that's stretching it a bit_.) queen.

"When I met Regina Mills I knew I was in for a world of trouble. I am in a world of trouble but for a different reason than I thought I would be. The thing many of you didn't know about Regina and I was that we were seeing each other. Not traditionally thought, well not at the start. More like meetings at night that ended with me climbing out the window. I know many of you are here because of Henry and I but if you saw her the real her, You would be here for Regina. Behind closed doors when she let her walls down she was so very" my voice take on a softer more wistful tone "fragile. It was amazing to see how she could care so much about other's behind the mask that was the Evil Queen. Regina's problem wasn't that she didn't feel anything but that she felt every single thing. She changed ya know, um and that was because of Henry. She finally had someone in her life to be good for. I hate the fact the she kil-passed on the way she did, I really do. I hate that she was in so much pain that she felt this was the only way to fix it. She blamed herself for what happened when I was in the enchanted forest. She said if she was better, gooder, no of this would have happened. She shouldn't have bla-"

"DAMN RIGHT SHE SHOULD SISTER! IF SHE NEVER CURSED OF NONE OF THIS WOULDA HAPPENED. I'M GLAD THE BITCH IS FUCKIN' DEAD!" It's quiet that you could hear a pin drop. That only lasts a second thought before Henry sobs loudly and I am pushing my way the the crowd towards Leroy. Before I know it I am in front of him and my fist connects with his nose. When he stumbles back I raise my fist to hit him again. Snow and David hold me back.

"Don't you say a goddamned thing about her you piece of shit. I'll kick your dwarf ass if you talk bad about her again." I fight against the hold Snow and David.

"EMMA! That's no way to talk to Leroy and he's right Honey." Snow begins to chide me for yelling at him when I break into sobs. It hurt so much. Oh God I miss her. I would sell my soul to the devil himself if I could hold her once more.

"No Snow, He's wrong. Mom was trying to be good and every one step forward she took YOU made sure she took 2 back. I think it would be best if you, David, and Leroy left." Henry's voice rang out strong and clear despite crying for the past 4 days. The pain was however still clear in his voice.

"What? Hen-" Snow begins before Charming stops her.

"Honey, Leave it let's go, come on it's for the best." David pleads with her.

"No. Henry why do you care so much you hated her and broke her heart and now you try to act like you cared? Less then a month ago when we found out she didn't Archie you said and I quote "She probably did something to deserve it." I mean" Snow snorts but continues "If you were my kid I would smacked your head clean off. You acted like a little shit you her then wonder why she kil-"

"SNOW WHITE STOP IT! You need to leave and find somewhere else for you and your husband to eat because I will not have that at my restaurant. An' Leroy you should start drinking at the Rabbit Hole." Granny all but yells at Snow as Ruby comes over and pulls the kid and I into tight hug.

* * *

"Hey Regina I- uh I found someone I might love her. I'm not to sure if ya would've liked her but she loves me so I guess you'll be fine with her. Henry's getting so old now a days. Oh and Ruby got married to Belle, they have a 13 year old girl. They named her after you, I'm her godmother and she was born 2-3 years after. Any way I was here to get you blessing to get married. She's good with our son. I wish you didn't do it we coulda been happy ya know? I haven't talked to Snow since your funeral. She and David left Storybrooke a few years back. Oh and you're gonna be a grandma. Henry and Paige are expecting their first kid. It's gonna be a boy. The want to name him after someone on your side of the family so. I don't know how to say goodbye to someone who's already gone but I need to do this and let go before I get married so. We miss you so much. I will always love you, I know it didn't always seem like it but I did. We all remember you as Regina Mills not the Evil Queen don't worry. Goodbye Regina." I place the flowers on her grave and press one final kiss to her headstone. "Love Ya." _Regina was right about Pain being a bittersweet friend_ I muse.

 **AN: I may or may not have begun to tear up writing the last part but that doesn't mean anything I cried like a baby during Romeo and Juliet and now I for some twisted reason try to have my bittersweet friend keep me company so. Please review and favorite seeing as this is a one-shot. It's not my best work but it's something.**


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